Dogpatch Press

Fluff Pieces Every Week Day

Tag: satire

5 dirty things furries do

by Patch O'Furr

Bear with me, I’m going to mention that old CSI episode “Fur and Loathing”¬†again. Few media portrayals have upset furry fandom so much. A fiction show about murder should get a license to exaggerate for entertainment, but the public somehow took it as a documentary. It made impressions that a furry convention for good natured nerd stuff, like drawing cartoons and getting dinner with friends, is a weekend long furpile for sex-mad fetishists. Other sensational media was even more responsible for spreading the impression. Of course to be fair, so are some furries.

This was on my mind when I found a thread about Fay V’s worst convention ever. It’s a wild trip with 78 tweets about eldritch horror pudding and orgies.

With that in mind, here are some of the more unusual kinks among furries, which I’m totally not making up at all.

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Furry Nights movie review – a crowd pleaser for lovers of campy indie horror.

by Patch O'Furr

Do you love trash like I do? ¬†In the 1970’s, exploitation movies became¬†a thing¬†where trash and sleaze were¬†loveable¬†qualities. They had fun doing¬†stuff the mainstream wouldn’t do. ¬†Along with the bad, came good access for audiences that Hollywood didn’t represent, like¬†minorities and subcultures. ¬†Now “Fursploitation” is creeping into popular awareness. I characterize it that way if it portrays¬†“furries” with¬†off-the-rack, poorly fitting mascot¬†costumes¬†and orgy jokes. ¬†That stuff¬†may not¬†play well with¬†furries, but it can. ¬†They’ll probably dislike it¬†if it has low effort at research, or feels carelessly opportunistic or mean, but it helps to be indie and share inside references to¬†laugh together.¬†A success would be CollegeHumor’s “Furry Force”, which the fandom took with¬†good humor.

Furry Nights is an indie horror movie directed by J. Zachary.  It premiered in late 2016 with a theater show in Atlanta. I heard from several very happy furry watchers who attended.  Then Zachary asked me to tell you about it.

Furry Nights is now available on iTunes. Here’s the synopsis from¬†the official website:

“What begins as a carefree weekend amongst a group of camping teens soon takes a strange turn when the gang¬†discovers they are not alone in the forest. ¬†FURRIES have rooted camp just across the nearby lake. ¬†Not worried about the¬†‚Äúparty animals,‚ÄĚ the kids sleep soundly that night, only to be woken by a real life horror ‚ÄĒ A BEAR!¬† One of the teens shoots and kills the grizzly monster, but quickly realizes the tragic truth ‚ÄĒ HE HAS SHOT A FURRY . . . Now, the maniacal furries will stop at nothing to make them pay . . .

CAN¬†THE TEENS SURVIVE THE¬†REVENGE OF THE FURRIES?!”

@KaiWulf¬†said:¬†“Indy film, very campy. We had a good laugh.” And here’s another happy watcher.

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2 Uncool – a furry celebrity’s disgrace is a test of fandom tolerance.

by Patch O'Furr

Remember when¬†Seinfeld was one of the biggest TV shows, and co-star Michael Richards derailed his career with a racist meltdown on stage? It happened at a comedy show, but it wasn’t part of the act. He apologized, and news said “It is actually one of the most honest apologies that a celebrity has ever given for bad behavior.”

It’s rare to see a career implode like that. Now let’s look at a furry happening that’s not so drastic, but more of a slow burn. A prominent performer in the fandom is being examined¬†for poorly representing it, and found unworthy of support by its¬†premiere convention. Bad behavior has been in plain view for years¬†with¬†no apologies. It took this long to accumulate¬†wider attention. Many members say it’s long overdue, and some find it discouraging that it took so long.

“2 The Ranting Gryphon” has a problem.

His George Carlin-styled comedy¬†has earned 24,000 follows on Youtube¬†and audiences of 1000+¬†at Anthrocon. I’ve seen¬†and¬†laughed at his¬†show¬†there. But they declined to host¬†him this year. His fans are very upset (almost as if he’s a¬†tenured “house comedian of fandom”?) ¬†2 himself appears to be the info source,¬†claiming to be a victim of invalid attacks by over-offended “SJW’s”. There’s only a vague official statement citing declining attendance, so pointing blame is untrustworthy. A con can pick whoever they want, and they just chose not to¬†pick him; friends and fame aren’t supposed to overrule¬†quality or board decisions for approval. (Free speech doesn’t apply¬†because it’s not between citizen and government – the host is a private organization. He isn’t “banned” and can attend the con. )

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The Cat, by Pat Gray – Book Review By Fred Patten.

by Patch O'Furr

Submitted by Fred Patten, Furry’s favorite historian and reviewer.

“Here is another of my reviews that was published ten years ago, edited in a manner that I didn’t like. ¬†This is my original review, so it’s a bit different from the printed version.”

USThe Cat, by Pat Gray.
Sawtry, Cambridgeshire, UK, Dedalus Ltd., March 1997, trade paperback £6.99 (124 pages).
U.S. edition: Hopewell, NJ, The Ecco Press, November 1998, hardcover $19.00 (124 + 1 pages).

‚ÄúA dark comedy with universal appeal, The Cat is the Animal Farm of the post-communist 1990s,‚ÄĚ says the American dust-jacket blurb, while a Scottish review of the original British edition says that, ‚ÄúGray‚Äôs reworking of the Animal Farm concept brings in a post-Thatcherite twist.‚ÄĚ Animal Farm may live forever, but is The Cat really a modernization of Animal Farm for Britain of the 1990s?

‚ÄúChez Maupassant‚ÄĚ is the typical British suburban home of the Professor and Mrs. Professor, their pet the Cat, and the presumably unnoticed Rat and Mouse. All live very comfortably, since the Professor is a gluttonous slob who leaves rich food everywhere.

‚ÄúThe cheesecake seemed to glow, luminous and fantastic, as the Professor skillfully slid it off its plate and cradled it in his large hand to prevent it breaking apart as his mouth closed in upon it. A look of childish pleasure crossed the Professor‚Äôs face, then a look of guilt, then he rammed the entire cheesecake into his mouth and began to eat.‚ÄĚ (pg. 11)

The pampered Cat, the brash Rat, and the peevishly ineffectual Mouse (the latter two living under the house or within its walls) are best friends. Unfortunately, the Professor dies of a coronary three pages into the story (though leaving the fridge open). The animals are mildly distressed, but see no reason to fear a change in their lavish lifestyle — until Mrs. Professor moves to Brighton, leaving the Cat behind. Read the rest of this entry »

Talking animals topic betrays culture-blind critics

by Patch O'Furr

Realistic (left) and anthropomorphic (right) illustrations for research study

Frontiers in Psychology research study illustrates realistic and anthropomorphic animals

Last year, a Flayrah news article drew outsiders who had never encountered Furries.
One wrote: “You all need therapy!”
I answered: “This IS our therapy, silly!”

Friends at Flayrah just reminded me about it. Dronon posted:

Chair of the Canadian Education Committee thinks that talking animals in children’s books are detrimental to education. …Aw darnit, scratch that – It’s a fake, satirical article. Well done!

Fred answered:

Some believe that the report of the Chinese banning “Alice in Wonderland” in 1931 because “talking animals are false” is an urban legend. Nobody can find such a law as having been passed.

Rakuen Growlithe added:

Dronon, there’s actually a bit of truth underlying the satire.

The topic led me to find that, although it may be satirized… yes, it has some truth. Read the rest of this entry »